Learn To Be Selfish, Your Family Will Thank You For It

Learn To Be Selfish, Your Family Will Thank You For It
Learn To Be Selfish, Your Family Will Thank You For It

Enlightened selfishness is the basis of all inspired service to the world. It superficially appears like the most unusual paradox, but when examined reveals an essential truth:

“A man can only give his gift proportionate to how much he is open to receiving the gifts of the universe”

But it’s wrong to be selfish…..right?

One of the greatest misconceptions of modern society is that being selfish is always unfair to others. The road to sainthood is through the path of selfless service to others is what we are taught.

On one level, un-evolved selfishness can definitely upset the harmony in a family.

A man who spends whatever time he wants doing whatever he wants after work regardless of whether or not his clan members have their needs met is not a great leader. Often, wives in such cases are at their limit taking the slack for his laziness and lack of focus.

Be in the Right Category

But if you are reading this you are probably not one that fits into the above category, right?

The selfishness that is needed is one that helps build and maintain the personal momentum of focused inspiration to lead your clan in the face of whatever life hits you with. Assuming the role of clan leader is one of life’s most sacred and important roles so it requires your greatest attention.

Complexity Draws Out Your Best

The complexity of modern life requires a consistent level of optimal performance by any man who aims to lead his family inspiringly to reach its full potential, both individually and collectively.

Any great performer in the world, from any discipline, base their greatest on their preparation. Read about the lives of world leading musicians, sports stars, athletes, spiritual leaders and you will see that they developed their own unique routine that helped wring every last drop of inspiration from their depths. That is why they become known as the greats.

Your Highest Imaginable Example

To lead by your highest imaginable example takes unparalleled commitment to preparation.

You are preparing to play the roles of provider, teacher, spiritual counsellor, personal coach, psychologist, chef, healer, business man, time management expert etc. in your everyday life for your family.

It’s insane to think you can just be your inspirational best as a clan leader by just turning up!

Alignment with your Sacred Power

By preparation I am talking about alignment with your deepest spiritual power. A Zen Clan Leader structures his life completely around his alignment to source energy, God, Buddha nature, life force; whatever the wording your heart resonates with is unimportant.

The aim is to consciously prepare yourself to bring out your inspired best. To inspire one must be in-spirit.

Our greatest power to be of service to our family and humanity is harnessed when we are at our happiest. Indeed our happiness is our greatest gift to our family and the world.

Receive the Universe

To be at our happiest requires dedicated time to conscious receiving of our own deepest needs, the gifts of the universe so to speak: love, optimal health, abundance, joy, peace etc.

To receive these gifts fully, we must align our minds to allow the unhindered flow of them into our reality. If your life is packed with responsibilities for others and little or no time is left for you, this stops flow causing stagnation.

Full flow can only happen when dedicated time has been taken to prepare ourselves to receive. Meditation, yoga, spiritual teachings, relaxation time, prayer are examples of how we as humans use our time to feel inspired and loved.

Hit the Issue at the Root

It has all to do with our perceptions. From our birth until the present moment, we have all formed many beliefs consciously and unconsciously.

The regular presence of frustration, annoyance, stress, anger, boredom and the likes are signs that we have unconscious emotional crap cutting the natural flow of well-being that is ours to enjoy.

Mediocre men just accept persistent negative emotions as an unquestionable part of life; clan leaders absolutely do not.

Stride Towards Your Greatness

Your greatest gift that you can give your wife, children and the world at large is your happiest self. For your family, five minutes in your inspired presence is more enlivening than five hours with an everyday frustrated martyr.

Before you can serve your gift or offering to others you first must be in alignment with your inner values and life purpose. Give yourself the sacred time to structure your life in a way that inspires you letting you serve your best self to those in your world. Practice this enlightened selfishness, and then amaze the world into inspired action!

How to Spice Up Your Life

How to Spice Up Your Life
How to Spice Up Your Life

If our life is too predictable, it feels boring. If it’s too uncertain, it feels unsafe. How is your life? If you think of life as a continuum with ‘adventure’ at one end and ‘boredom’ at the other end, where would you place your life? Is it too predictable? Or too wild?To be happy we need to find a balance between comfort and adventure.

A quick way to find out is take a close look at one of your usual weekdays. Let’s say, you choose a Monday. Now jot down all the things you can reasonably expect to happen next Monday.

When you compile your list, make sure to include any regular TV programs, such as the the news, shows, and so on. I think you’ll find that this particular day of the week is quite predictable. And maybe most of your days show a predictable pattern. Which means that they are comfortable.

After all, human beings find comfort in what is predictable. But there is a fine line between comfort and boredom. If you keep on living our life within predictable patterns, nothing new will develop. In term of spirituality, you will falter on your spiritual path if you don’t embrace the unknown.

Adding spice to life makes you happier

It’s important to get out of our comfort zone. For some people, just a little may be enough. Personally, I thrive on challenges. Each challenge allows me to develop my life further. But I am not without fear. I too have a built-in reluctance to embark on challenges – and that keeps me safe. However, too much reluctance can make for a boring life. Let’s take a look at the stumbling blocks and how to overcome them:

1. The initial fear

“I can’t do it. It’s too difficult!” This is a natural response to every new challenge. How does one deal with such negative thoughts? My trick is to say first of all: “Yep. I’ll do it.” This is how you invite the adventure. (Tip: say “Yes” before your rational mind kicks in with, “Are you crazy?!”) For example, next time someone asks you, “We’re forming a fun football team. Do you want to join?” simply say, “Yes!” – even if you’ve never played before. Worry about it later!

2. Feeling overwhelmed

“It’s too big. I’ll never complete it.” This is a natural response to a challenge. It’s not a real challenge if it doesn’t feel too big. A good way to overcome this fear is to break down the challenge into manageable steps. For example, let’s say that you have decided to run a half-marathon in six months time. If you have never run before, this would seem impossible. However, to start out walking for 1 kilometre and jogging for 100 metres may feel possible. Make a plan of small steps towards your challenging goal.

3. The mid-way slump

“I’m not really enjoying this. I think I’ll flag it.” This is a natural phase in your undertaking. Expect it and you won’t be sidetracked. Every challenge starts out with reluctance, and then excitement. About mid-way there is a slump in motivation. Then there can be an upsurge in confidence as your skill level increases. Right before completion is another difficult phase.

4. Dropping out before the end

“I can’t finish it. It’s taking too much of my energy.” I saw a statistic that 90% of all people quit a project before finishing. That’s right: only 10% complete! I’m not really surprise because I know from experience how difficult it is to finish. Right now, for example, I’m in the last phase of completing my E-book. If I listened to my self-talk, I would put it aside and not complete it. The kind of thoughts my mind produces at this stage are: “I just can’t pull it off’”, “It’s too difficult”, “It’s not good enough”, “I haven’t got time”, and so on.

The way past this barrier is to be encouraging. Point out to yourself what you’ve done so far and that your close to the finish line: “Only a few steps to go now!” Map out a path to completion that seems manageable.

5. Celebrate the completion!

It’s important to stop and celebrate with others when you have completed your challenging project. Thank yourself for following through, despite all the difficulties. Enjoy your new-found skills. Each completed challenge will enrich our life and open new doors.

By Mary Jaksch

3 Instant Ways to Calm Your Mind

3 Instant Ways to Calm Your Mind
3 Instant Ways to Calm Your Mind

Is your mind in a spin? Do you feel stressed? Here are three ways to calm your mind in an instant.

The deep breath.

Take a deep breath. Fill your belly and your chest as your inhale deeply. Then release the breath, letting it flow out naturally. Notice how your mind changes when you do this. The deep breath can help you in difficult situations. For example, if you feel a surge of anger and are just about to lash out, taking a deep breath allows you to retain control of yourself. Use the deep breath often during the day. It is especially useful when you are feeling uptight or angry: it can release you from the grip of strong emotions. When you take a deep breath, you regain an overview over what is happening. It’s as if you are call forth your innate power of wisdom.

The sigh

Another technique of instant calmness is the sigh. Draw the air in rapidly through your nose or mouth and expel it with a whoosh. Try it and notice what happens. The sigh is a release technique. Use it to let go of pent-up worries or to untangle the mind. For example, if you are at work and are trying to hold too many thoughts in your mind, simply stop what you are doing for a moment and sigh.

The slow release

Inhale through your nose with energy and exhale through your mouth very slowly while counting to ten. As you breathe out, let your shoulders drop. This is a very powerful way to calm the mind and relax tension in the body. Use it if your mind is very scattered. For example, if you are meditating and find that your mind is running wild, take three slow release breaths to settle your mind.

Experiment with one-breath calmness techniques. You may find that one of the three works particularly well for you, or that each one works best in particular circumstances. If you work at a computer a lot of the time, try installing a break reminder program. You can set it up so that a pop-up reminds you of taking mini-breaks. Try and use it to take a calming breath each time.

To read more interesting articles like this, visit goodlifezen.com.

5 Timeless Ways to Turn Your Life Around at Any Age

5 Timeless Ways to Turn Your Life Around at Any Age
  1. Focus a little less on the future, and a little more on the present
  2. Focus more on the journey
  3. Do hard things
  4. Embrace uncertainty
  5. Build and nurture quality relationships

Things can change if you want them to, at any age.  Life changes every single moment, and so can you.

Last week I received three emails with the exact same subject line – “Turning My Life Around” – from three different coaching/course students.  This synchronicity certainly caught my attention.  Each of these student’s emails went into detail about their life situation and danced around the same fundamental theme and question:

“I don’t know what I want to do with my future, but I want to be successful…  So what should I do?”

Obviously a sweeping, open-ended question like this is difficult to answer.  But here’s my attempt to answer it for all of us – a short list of five timeless principles and strategies Angel and I live by – a list worth working on regardless of your age or what you decide to do with the rest of your life:

1.  Focus a little less on the future, and a little more on the present.

Yes, it’s healthy to plan for the future, but not at the full expense of today.  The truth is no matter how smart you are or how hard you try, you can’t accurately figure out the future.  Even people who have a systematic plan (steps to be a doctor, steps to be a successful entrepreneur, etc.) don’t actually know what will happen down the road.  And if they have any certainty at all, they’re a bit naive.

Life rarely goes as planned.  For every person that succeeds in doing exactly what they set out to do in the exact time frame they set out to do it in, there are dozens of others who start strong and get derailed.  And if this happens to you, it isn’t a bad thing.  New obstacles and opportunities may come along to shift your perspective, to strengthen your resolve, or to change your direction for the better.  The destination you fall in love with someday may not even exist today.  For example, just a few short years ago the esteemed career paths of working at Google, Facebook and Twitter didn’t exist.  Neither did the job of professional coach and blogger at Marc and Angel Hack Life.

So if you can’t plan out your future in its entirety, what should you do?  Focus a little less on the future and focus more on what you can do now that will benefit you no matter what the future brings.  Read.  Write.  Learn and practice useful skills.  Test your skills and ideas.  Build things.  Be adventurous and seek real-world experiences.  Cultivate healthy relationships.  These efforts will help in any future circumstances that come your way.

One of the best ways to begin with all of this, I think, is to build something small in your free time.  Most people fritter their free time away on things that don’t matter, like TV, video games, social media, etc.  A year of that and you have absolutely zero to show for it.  But if you painted every day, or practiced your web design skills, or wrote on a blog, or updated and perfected a video channel on YouTube, or started building a side business/passion project, or spent more time networking with the right people… at the end of a year you’ll have built something.  And you’ll have some great life experiences too – experiences you can point to and say, “I built that, and I learned this,” which, sadly, most people can’t do.

Also, it’s important to mention that although it may seem easier for younger people to do these things, it’s 100% possible for all of us to take small steps in the right direction, day in and day out, for the rest of our lives.

2.  Focus more on the journey.

The most prolific and beneficial experience is not in achieving something you want, but in seeking it.  It’s the journey towards an endless horizon that matters – goals that move forward with you as you chase them.  It’s all about the pursuit and what you learn along the way – the “moving.”

The most important reason for moving from one place to another is to see what’s in between.  In between is where passions are realized, love is found, strength is gained, and memories are made.  You can’t get any of that without firsthand living.

In other words, the right journey is the destination.  (Read The War of Art.)

3.  Do hard things.

If you want to stunt your growth and feel stuck in the same place forever, make excuses.  If, on the other hand, you want to stop feeling trapped, do things that make you uncomfortable – things you aren’t very good at.  There’s no excuse for remaining stuck.  There’s no excuse for making the same exact mistakes over and over again.  Life is too short.  You’ve got to stretch your boundaries and break free.

One of the most important skills you can develop in life is being OK with some level of discomfort.  Because the best things are often hard to come by, and if you shy away from difficulty and discomfort, you’ll miss out on them.

Mastering a new skill is hard.  Building a business is hard.  Writing a book is hard.  A marriage is hard.  Parenting is hard.  Staying in shape is hard.  All are amazing and worth every bit of effort you can muster.

If you get good at doing hard things, you can do anything.

How do you get good at this?  Purposefully do things today that are uncomfortable, and start in small doses.  Try exercising for ten minutes, even if it’s hard, and repeat this practice every day for a month before increasing your exercise duration by even the slightest margin.  Try journaling or meditating every day for ten minutes.  When you find yourself avoiding discomfort or procrastinating, push yourself just a little bit more, but don’t do more than ten minutes.  It’s all about starting small and building a daily ritual that gradually strengthens your mind and body, and allows you to do (larger) hard things effortlessly in the long run.  (Angel and I demonstrate this process in detail in the “Goals and Growth” module of Getting Back to Happy.)

4.  Embrace uncertainty.

A related skill to “doing hard things” is thriving in uncertainty.  Starting a business, for example, is a remarkable thing to do, but if you’re scared of uncertainty you’ll skip it.  You can’t possibly know exactly how things will turn out, and so if you need to know how things will turn out, you’ll avoid life-changing opportunities, projects, career moves, relationships, etc.

But if you can be OK with not knowing, you’ll open yourself up to an endless pool of possibilities.  But of course they won’t come easy…

Sometimes you will not be able to see where you are going; every step will seem uncertain.  But know that as long as you follow your intuition and take baby steps, your soul’s inner GPS will guide you home.  You will find that you will be the right person, at the right place, at the right time, doing the right thing on point.  Trust your instincts.  Relax.  You know what to do.  Living is about learning as you go.

And remember, living is risky business.  Every decision, every interaction, every step, every time you get out of bed in the morning, you take a small risk.  To truly live is to know you’re getting up and taking that risk, and to trust yourself to take it.  To not get out of bed, clutching to illusions of safety, is to die slowly without ever having truly lived.

If you simply ignore your feelings and let uncertainty win, you will never know anything for sure, and in many ways this unknowing will be worse than finding out your hunch was wrong.  Because if you were wrong, you could make adjustments and carry on with your life without ever looking back and wondering what might have been.

Bottom line: When you get good at handling discomfort and uncertainty, you can do all kinds of remarkable things that seem impossible now: travel the world and live frugally while blogging about it, write a book, start a small profitable business, relocate to a new city, learn to play a musical instrument, take a job with a startup you admire, travel to “bucket list locations” with your family, and much more.  All of these ideas can be achieved in a relatively short time, but you have to be OK with discomfort and uncertainty, and you have to start sooner rather than later.  (Angel and I discuss this further in the “Success” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)

5.  Build and nurture quality relationships.

There are right people and wrong people for you.  There are fake people and then there are those who are true friends and sincere companions on the path.  There are people who take the heart out of you, and those who put it back.  You have a choice of who to spend time with.  True friends (personal or professional) have an honest heart and will go out of their way to help you when you need it most.  Stick with the people who never let you down and keep their promises.  You can’t fake that.

Truthfully, if your time and energy is misspent on the wrong relationships (personal or professional), or on too many activities that force you to neglect your good relationships, you can end up in a tedious cycle of fleeting friendships, superficial romances that are as thrilling as they are meaningless, and a general sense of wondering why you always seem to be running in place, chasing affection and admiration.

How do you build healthy, lasting personal and professional relationships?  How do you find friends that lift you higher?  How do you meet a significant other that belongs at your family reunions?  Here’s a good read on how to meet the right people.

As this topic relates to professional success…  Talk to lots of people every day, even if it feels uncomfortable.  Bosses.  Colleagues.  Employees.  Professors.  Classmates.  Social club members.  Neighbors.  Friends.  Friends of friends.  Everyone!  Why?  Networking…

I have worked for three employers since I graduated from college (I left all three employers by choice and on good terms, and eventually started my own business), but I only interviewed with the first employer.  The other two employers offered me jobs, before I even had a formal interview, based strictly on the recommendation of a hiring manager (someone I had networked with over the years).  When employers look to fill a position the first thing they often do is ask the people they trust if they know someone who would do well in the position.

If you start building your network today, you’ll be set in the years ahead.  Over time, you’ll continue talking to new people you meet through your current network and your network’s reach and the associated opportunities will continue to snowball for the duration of your life.

Again, this may seem easier for young people, but it’s possible for all of us.  It just takes effort.

The underlying key is to be trustworthy in your relationships.  When someone gives someone an employment/business opportunity, the biggest fear is that this person is not trustworthy – that they’ll slack off and try to cheat the system.  Someone who has established a positive reputation over the years will likely be more trusted, and more likely to be recommended.  Learn to be trustworthy by being honest, admitting mistakes and fixing them, and generally going above and beyond the call of duty in your personal and professional relationships whenever you’re able.

If you adhere to this, you’ll build a good reputation and people will appreciate and endorse you, which is the best way to get a job, a business investor, or another good friend.

Afterthoughts

If you follow the principles discussed above, you’ll be remarkable.  You’ll be way, way ahead of most other people (even though you’re not competing with them).  And opportunities will gradually come your way: job opportunities, a chance to build something special with someone, an idea for a business that you can build yourself, a new skill to learn and grow from, etc.

Of course, you can put all this off and take an easier, familiar path that keeps you hiking in circles…

Or you can start down a new path today, turn your life around, and see what the rest of it has to offer you.

The floor is yours…

Which point above resonated the most with you?

What’s the #1 thing you want to change in your life?

To read more interesting articles like this, visit marcandangel.com.

7 Timeless Strategies for Finding Inner Strength

7 Timeless Strategies for Finding Inner Strength
7 Timeless Strategies for Finding Inner Strength

7 Timeless Strategies for Finding Inner Strength (When You Need it Most)

We originally read this article by MarcandAngel.com and found it was a great read. The bullets don’t really do it justice, so be sure to read the full article (link below).

  1.  Decide to be OK with NOT being OK all the time.
  2.  Focus only on today.
  3.  Realize that one tiny step is all you ever need to take.
  4.  Remind yourself that few things in life are as personal as they seem.
  5.  Create healthy space for yourself away from external negativity.
  6.  Make sure you’re only seeking support from the right sources.
  7.  Choose an attitude that moves you forward.

Your turn…

This was a great article, read the full article here…

Simple Phrases that Will Give You Strength

Simple Phrases that Will Give You Strength
Simple Phrases that Will Give You Strength

Yep, I talk to myself… we all do! What a lot of people don’t realize is that it’s not only healthy to talk to yourself, it’s a key to feeling a sense of control and peace.

You can say the wrong things to yourself and feel a sense of weakness and vulnerability.

The trick is having a few positive mantras that you can repeat in your mind over and over when you need them. Here are a few of my favorites which you’re welcome to use anytime you need them. They give me strength and they’ll do the same for you.

  1. I love myself no matter what.
  2. I’m in charge of my own emotions.
  3. I will attract what I think about so I better think about good stuff!
  4. When I’m going through hell, I should keep going… this too shall pass!
  5. Everyone has horrible scars. Mine make me who I am.
  6. What I’m looking for is not in the past. It’s in the present.
  7. Every single day is a brand new beginning–tomorrow could be great!

12 Little Known Laws of Happiness

12 Little Known Laws of Happiness
12 Little Known Laws of Happiness

“Happiness depends upon ourselves.”

– Aristotle

12 Little Known Laws of Happiness

  1.  Integrity is the foundation of a happy, meaningful life.
  2.  Happiness depends on being free, and freedom depends on being brave.
  3.  Happiness is wholeness, and every step and experience is what makes you whole.
  4.  A happy life story does not mean an easy life story.
  5.  Happiness lives in all the small things.
  6.  Happiness is not some possession to be prized – it is a quality of thought, a positive state of mind in pursuit of meaning.
  7.  The secret of everyday happiness is not in always doing what one likes, but in mindfully liking what one does.
  8.  You can’t be happy unless you’re unhappy sometimes too.
  9.  Happiness is an evolving mindset.
  10.  Happiness flourishes through detachment.
  11.  It’s impossible to build your own happiness on the unhappiness of others.
  12.  You are incomparable to everyone else, and so are your triggers for happiness.

To read more interesting articles like this, visit marcandangel.com.

9 Ways to Make Your Days Simple Again

9 Ways to Make Your Days Simple Again
9 Ways to Make Your Days Simple Again

Found a great article on how to make life simpler which everyone needs to read. The author’s recommendations need to be read to be fully understood; however, here’s the condensed list:

  1. Know what your perfect day looks and feels like
  2. Determine what’s most important to you
  3. Say “no” to unnecessary commitments that do not support your priorities
  4. Limit your daily tasks
  5. Schedule at least one distraction-free time block each day
  6. Do ONLY one thing at a time
  7. Batch the smaller, less important tasks
  8. Leave space between everything
  9. Practice gratitude

Any darn fool can make a day more complicated than it has to be; it takes a touch of genius to make it simple again.

Read the full post on: marcandangel.com.

Having Less and Loving It

Having Less and Loving It
Having Less and Loving It

Be Content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.
– Lao Tzu

Spend five minutes watching TV ads and you’ll know what makes us happier. In the eyes of the advertiser, that is. A new car, diamond earrings, a new kitchen, carpets, house, overseas travel – everything that adverts offer us pretends to be a magic pill that will make us happier.

But does it?

Actually, it does.

I remember a time when I was so small that I had to stretch to see over the table. My parents bought me a  pair of shiny red shoes. And I loved them! I loved them so much that I put them under my pillow at night.

I can’t remember what happened next. But I suppose it is what always happens after we get a new toy. Scuff marks appear on the new shoe, or you drive you car into a hedge and get scratches over the gleaming paintwork. You put down a hot pot on the new kitchen bench and can’t get rid of the burn mark. Your new shiny thing ages.

So, yes – buying something new does make you feel happier. But only for a short while. That’s what our consumer society is built upon. Because when the thrill wears off, we need to go shopping again.

The beauty of less

A minimalist embraces the beauty of less, the aesthetic of spareness, a life of contentedness in what we need and what makes us truly happy. ~ Leo Babauta in The Simple Guide to a Minimalist Life

I’ve recently been thinking about the difference between the mind of having, and the mind of being. These two are completely different ways to experience life. In a commercial society, everything is for sale, and everything needs to have a benefit.

The focus on benefits is all about having. What we’ve lost sight is that there is also being. If you look at the question below, you’ll see how limited the ‘having’ mindset is:

What is the benefit of being alive?

That questions is absurd, isn’t it? It just doesn’t make sense. Because being alive is – well – about being. And not about having.

In our consumer society, the mind of having is predominant. Our value in society is measured not by how we are, but by what we have. Everything turns into a lifestyle accessory when we look at it from the perspective of ‘having’ – even love or friendship.

One of the ways to escape the trap of having is the way of Minimalism

I’ve recently come across a thought-provoking book by Leo Babauta, called The Simple Guide to a Minimalist Life. In it he describes simple ways of escaping consumerism, in order to heighten happiness.

What is a minimalist life?

It is a life, say Leo, “that is stripped of the unnecessary, to make room for that which gives you joy…It’s not a life of nothing, of boringness. It’s a life of richness, in less.”

How to become a minimalist

Leo sets out four steps that help us embrace a life of minimalism:

  • Start by realizing you already have
    enough.
  • Start cutting back on clutter and
    possessions.
  • Start simplifying your schedule.
  • Slowly edit everything you do.

By Mary Jaksch

Stop Being Your Best and Enjoy Life…

Stop Being Your Best and Enjoy Life...

A lot of times, I hear the phrases “Be your best,” “Live your best life,” “Be the best in everything.” You can buy books and read tons of articles that will “teach” you to be your best (you can check out Optimal Thinking: How to be Your Best Self if you want to employ “the best” attitude).

I think that these mottos create a generation of perfectionists who are highly unsatisfied with everything they have in life because they do not believe that they have reached “the best” status.

What is the problem with being the best?

Well, I can’t say that I am the best I can be. Sometimes I do not look the best, sometimes I do not feel the best, sometimes I do not make the best decisions, sometimes I am not the best mother or wife and sometimes I am not the best friend. Striving to be the best will make me a failure in my own eyes because I cannot live up to the expectations of the “best world.”

Being the best means that you constantly have to climb to the top of a ladder that you have created for yourself. You cannot stop and appreciate the moment as well as you cannot let yourself go down a few steps.

Every day you are hungry for new achievements and new proofs of your “bestness” (being the best in your professional field, earning more money, being the best parent, being the best student, being the best in a competition, having the best house etc.).

After you have achieved all of this you start pushing your own desire for being the best onto people around you (you want the best partner, the best kids, the best parents and the best friends).

When they do not fulfill your expectations you feel like they’ve failed you and that they are not good enough to be around you. This leads to a deep feeling of depression, dissatisfaction with your life, permanent loss of happiness and a 100% imbalance.

For peace of mind, we need to resign as general manager of the universe –Larry Eisenberg, actor

Instead of being the best, I choose to be good in everything I do and this makes my life much more balanced and fulfilling. The motto that I try to follow is “Good is good enough.” I think that this motto can help anybody to live a good life where they can comfortably find their own ZEN.

How do you incorporate the “Good Is Good Enough” principle?

Here are just a few ideas that can get you started and I am sure that you can transform them to fit your life and desires:

  • Set your own standards in life. Do not follow somebody’s else example or vision of life
  • Do not compete with everybody around you
  • Be in touch with yourself
  • Be grateful for what you have (appreciate even the smallest things like a sunny day or a smile on your partner’s face)
  • Look at the big picture. Do not fret about little things like dishes that have not been washed or grass that hasn’t been mowed in a while. What is more important: these details or your general well-being?
  • Do not expect much from others, just be grateful for who they are and for the fact that they are in your life
  • Write a list of expectations of the best you. Analyze this list and decide which of these expectations are really important and will make you happy
  • Do not try to be the best self for somebody else (for your partner, your kids, your friends or colleagues)
  • When the thoughts of “bestness” start chasing you, fight them with loving-kindness meditation

What are your ideas about being the best?

Do you think it is important to be the best, or would you rather be happy and balanced by using the “Good Is Good Enough” principle?

A guest post by Anastasiya Goers from Balance in Me

To read more interesting articles like this visit, goodlifezen.com